I had a few hours to kill before my Rad Chemo
treatment, and what better way to pass the time than to hang out with my buds in the Harley shop showroom, talking HOG and spending 100 bucks for a t-shirt. That’s always
been the not so inside joke among Harley owners: “What’s the HD in
Harley-Davidson stand for?”
“Hundred dollars.”
I don’t care. It’s what I want. It’s what I need. It
makes me feel free and most uncancerous, riding my iconic soulmate over these
country roads on days like this, rising above the sore throat, shortness of
breath, chest pains, bruises, nausea, needles, drugs, and as I mentioned in
yesterday’s post: all stirred up by headaches in my stomach. (See Day 015)
This Stage I exhaust system upgrade is Harley entry-level
coolness, as all good bikers begin tailoring their new rides with the endless
options and add-ons available. I’m no exception.
But, today a defining moment. That’s when the
sad semantic hilarity of it all hit me: There I was, spending serious bucks for
a Stage I upgrade to fine-tune how my rolling beauty breathes and rumbles, and
meanwhile, back in the other saddle, I’m wrestling with a Stage III+ cancer that
is roughhousing how I breathe and stumble. A good day for Cosmic jests, eh?
And, what’s in a word? Today, all of my life is standing
right here (a fine place for profundity, next to a Harley dealer’s waiting room’s
coffee pot).
Staging.
I’m staging my bliss in the service department and
staging my bondage at the parts desk. Deeper in, I see this as how we all
breathe, rumble and stumble along in every “normal” day, tweaking ourselves,
adjusting our internal mirrors, dancing with our demons.
*Confidential to everyone: Sure, science made the
world, but poetry spins it.*
Every day, I’d like to give a nod each to the roles poetry
and science play in our lives, how we act, and how we’re acted upon. Right
about here in this blog, you can see this is where I’m working hard to take
your mind off what I’m thinking.
Oh, I almost forgot the other defining moment today,
when I rode off in that sweet new staged and upgraded potato-potato-potato sound,
the bike sounding more like my body’s science, and me looking more like its
poetry.
More as we go, El
You have always made me think, you know what I mean. This day's blog really made me think. You are right - we SHOULD buy what we want, live how we want to, dress how we like, listen to music and read poetry we like, eat what they say we shouldn't -- this is our life, to live how we choose. I am so happy you got the upgrades on your girl - does she have a name?? You are handling this all so well B., my heart is with you every step. Big, big hugs
ReplyDeleteAvis: And a hearty carpe diem to you, too! Now, name for the bike? Not yet. I'll save that for winter....Egads. :) El
Deleteatta boy!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Susan. Amazing how far an attaboy! goes ... and lasts. Thanks! Best, El
DeleteI am so sorry to hear about the side effects you are experiencing but so glad you are able to enjoy your Harley. And I can resonate with some of your thoughts about experiencing what you want. Part of why Mary and I are currently on this 'genealogy/family visit' journey is simply that: we have the time and resources this summer and figured we'd just do it. We are currently in Indiana and there is a Harley shop right next door to us and I thought of you :) It does seem like a lovely way to see the countryside.
ReplyDeleteKathy: I might take exception with your last comment. I think it's THE BEST way to see the countryside (unless you can fly). It's what makes these interminable north country winters bearable. Thanks for playing, and safe travels! Best, El
ReplyDelete